Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label silly. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

DAPHNE THE SEEING EYE DUCK


Daphne Daphne  quack, quck, quck.
Daphne Daphne the Seeing Eye duck.
Daphne stops you from that truck.
‘Cept for Daphne’s flap and squawk,
across its path, you would be muck.

Red’s on top, this Daphne knows.
So when from green to amber goes,
before across the street alights,
hoping too that you won’t trip,
pulls you back with beaky grip.

Daphne mallard color’s dull
Not her mind, it’s sharp and full.
Knows her task and her venue well.
You’re no road pie to show and tell.

Alights up to the sky to go.
Daphne’s not a dog you know.
Carry poop bag?  Not a chance!
then rains down poop-bits happenstance.

Daphne Daphne quack, quck, quck.
Daphne Daphne she’s quite a duck

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

A Mid Summer Nights Dinner Delight

Dramatis Personae:
Granny Smith
Tomato Tommy
Ci Anti
Toddy 
Wife
Narrator 

Act I
Below recount I, eye to you,

about a dream ‘peers more than true.
My dinner drink’s sweet concoction
caused a slumber here I’ve fashioned.
Caring not about your vote, I
the truth herein, do invoke.

Witnessed the court yard, moon hung low

Sultry mists a webs blocked glow.
In herein I repeat my site
For all your enjoyments’ delight:

ACT II

Holding hands, arms thin as twigs
Dance they both to the gods and begged,
“Keeps us free from bugs and like
while we enjoy our life’s delights.”

And all around does Granny Smith

Entwined in love Tomato Tom
And watching closely Ci Anti John
Who has a crush as any a grape and
Can fermented love in a bottle stand.

Granny and Tommy pies they make

Their love’s an oven both they bake
One for main with bread and cheese;
the other, an after dinner please.

Ci Anti John should play apart.

Fermented love just needs a start.
While those two dance abouttheir fires pyre, bubble, boil and shout.

So he to glass their lips provide

what the nose and tongue let slide
down the throat and in the mind
the dull affect of his drugged wine.

Granny Smith a solid core

and Tom Tomato a slushy bore,
to Ci Anti asked and cried
“Please leave us be, we cause no harm
We dance around the fire warm.
Cooked just right, a true delight,
sprinkle cheese on both of us
What could be wrong? We’re just desserts.”

Up on a plate they pirouette

Spin the dough and let it set.
And to Tommy’s sliced red sweet guts
a blanket of cheese this body thus.

And Granny, sliced in the pan she bakes

no longer dancing feet she makes.
And here too, a crust so fine and thin
above and below her sugared skin.

Ci Anti hearing none of this,

his drug-made-brain a harden’d mess,
into the oven both he threw
and slur said he “good dinner’s food.
”He promptly gobbled up the two.

A fart forced from Ci Anti’s hips.

A smile crossed his wine soaked lips
And another bite he did par take.
“In my belly they dance and shake,”


ACT IV
Awoke I in a salty sweat,
from my dream’s dream I did forsake
not believing that awe full take
I searched realities welcome bite,
and to my left and my relief
was my sweet hotty totty wife.
A smile wide with apple spice:
“I know you like the Granny Smith
cooked just tart and barely sliced.”

My totty wife, her bosom tight

her hips were bare ‘cept for light,
and upon whose body I did lay
all that evening danced this way.

Horizontal bopping is all I’ll state.

A gentleman should not relate
intimate details of pies and cake.
And with her love, I don’t forsake.

To end this tale of fruit and dance,

of dancing partners cooked, depanced,
taking bites of love pie here
and sliced bare apple over there,
while in between the best did lay,
dessert my friends? I will not say.

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Dust Bunnies

Dust bunnies come and dust bunnies go.
Where do they come from, can we show?
That very question was asked some days ago,
and posed to minds that ought to know:
Perplexed, puzzled, and  furrowed brow.
Eyes crossed with purpose and wonder, strained.
No answer forth coming, dumb as snow.
“As a fact, this we know.”
“They grow in corners, under sofas and couches.”
“As a fact, this we know.”
“They can double in size in a day or so.”
Again we’re asked,
“What do they eat? Where do they sleep?”
“Ah, um, ah …”
Another mind stumping,
mental,
exercise treat.
“But, they’ve got no feet!
Where are their ears”
“They’re faster than brooms.
They scoot in front or slip around.”
“And got no toes!”
“They scoot in front or slip around,
sliding so fast,  scamper to another room.
All the while,
they ride on the backs of dogs and cats.
Dare I say, they play with mice when you’re away.”
Cornered,
Quickly… they…collapse,
your guard comes down
and…
approached,
and…
touch to grab,
and…
they jump-flit-away! They’re gone.
Playing peek-a-boo,
and
Do It All Over Again.
“You have a cure?”
It’s no use they’ll get away!
It always happens. There’s no…..!!!
Varoooom, varooom,  all gone, all gone.
“I got me, ha-ha-ha , an electric broom.”

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Kendall's Confession

Bubbles bubbles wiggles and giggles,
I like to fart in the pool.
Who can tell when the bubbles swell,
Hey I’m nobody’s fool.

And it’s not the tub
with those captured smells
No matter how the fan swirls

Bubbles, bubbles wiggles and giggles

I like to fart in the pool.